DETECTIVE VON SCHLAGEN INVESTIGATES.
Friends of Needy Kids, the charity that dries the tears of needy kids, was robbed overnight. Detective Obi Von Schlagen was called to the scene early this morning to investigate.
Terrible, terrible, terrible.
Colin Cumberbund, beloved Founder of FONK, arrived at work early this morning to find something amiss. He quickly called police who dispatched investigators to the scene.
Detective Von Schlagen quickly established that theives had broken into FONK and stolen a shipment of Flobbles. The Flobbles had been donated by the toy’s manufacturer. They were supposed to be shipped to needy kids later today.
“The courier was supposed to come at noon,” said Reeny Mussolini, FONK’s Director of Volunteer Services. “Those poor children would have had them tomorrow. Terrible, terrible, terrible.”
“Terrible,” added a deeply distraught Colin Cumberbund.
Detective Von Schlagen refused to comment on the ongoing investigation.